 Those that know me know that I am a quick thinker and a quick talker.
Yet, over the years I have learned more and more about the importance of silence, especially as a facilitator. My job is to hold the space, not fill it with my opinion. What I appreciate about Elaine Lin Hering's work are the multiple layers that go into how we unlearn silence, and how we unlearn the myriad of ways that we silence others.
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Over a decade ago, I was introduced to the 5 Chinese Elements and which one I am most aligned to based on my personality.
I aligned with 2 -- Earth and Wood. It wasn't a surprise. Today, during a NeverDoneBefore session with Mirjam Leunissen, I was able to look at an old learning in a new way. She invited me to forget what I had learned previously about "my" element and instead explore the 4 elements of earth, water, fire, and air through my body.  A few weeks ago, I wrote about my experience reading The Memo by Minda Harts, and made a request to you for other books that I must read that address women and leadership, without forgetting about the intersectionality that many women face.
Thank you, Bronwyn Djefel for recommending Power to me. Interweaving personal stories, with client stories, and her coaching wisdom, Kemi Nekvapil shares with us her version of power -- a version that we can all step into because it's a power that comes from within. My very first job out of graduate school was teaching at an all-boys middle school in Boston.
My previous teaching experience was at the high school level, and I wasn't prepared for what middle school boys would bring me. One on one, these boys were charming and kind. Together they could be cruel -- and were cruel. They could eat you alive. This is when and where I had to solidify my presence -- not just as a teacher, but also as a woman. Yesterday, I started a new book circle with a cohort of HR folks at an American company.
When I got the participant list last week, I was shocked to find 34 people. WHAT !?!?!?!? My capacity is usually 18, and all the other groups with this company are under that number. Somehow this one slipped through the cracks. When I got the list, I asked if we could split the group in 2, but with 7 days until kick-off and no additional budget, they said no. WHAT I'M READING WEDNESDAY: The Perfectionists Guide to Losing Control by Katherine Morgan Schafler9/11/2024  Prior to picking up this book, I would refer to myself as a "recovering perfectionist".
Now, I realize that how impactful that phrase is, and how it's laden with past shame that can resurface so easily. Shafler helps us see that perfectionism doesn't have to be a dirty word. It doesn't have to be something that you recover from, like an illness or a disease. Instead, it can be harnessed. It can be your superpower, rather than your kryptonite. In the French language, whether you are a girl or a woman, to many you will always be a "fille" (girl).
Earlier this morning, I was talking to a friend of mine, and he referenced a "girl" in my town who has the same dog that he has. In my head, I pictured someone the age of my daughter, who's 10 - a girl. Yet, that's not what he meant. He meant an adult - someone I would call a woman.  When I look at my bookshelves, I am saddened to see how many leadership and business books line my shelves that are written by mostly white men.
These are books that I have encountered over the years on someone's "must read" lists for leadership. When I was leading a book circle this Spring with a group of 20 women, using the book Playing Big by Tara Mohr, I realized just how much I was missing out on, and how much my readers were missing out on, due to the prevalence of the white perspective in so many leadership books, and thus my book circles. Minda Harts doesn't mince words when she calls out this phenomenon at the beginning of the book - women of color don't need more books written by white men and white women.  Corporate Client : How long will you be gone? Sometimes members of my book circles ask me if I can do more than just book circles. They ask me if I can do something with their team that doesn't include reading a book.
My answer: "Of course. What do you have in mind?" Earlier this week, I met with a team of 15 - some of whom had been part of the team for a while, and 6 of them were brand new. I didn't want to do some gimmicking, team building workshop, and decided to focus on CONNECTION - my go-to in most instances. The team leaded trust me and essentially gave me a blank slate to create. Of course, I used books as my inspiration. |
Hi there!I am Theresa Destrebecq. |
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