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I actually live in an area of the world with a hell of a lot of Superyachts, and the sight of them usually makes me want to vomit.
I would much rather be in a kayak. Luckily, that seems to be what I’m steering, according to Oliver Burkeman. Let’s back up, first, though.  When I was in my late 20s, I was engaged to a man named Greg. My parents weren’t thrilled with the match, and weren’t shy about voicing their concerns, yet they went along with my decision. The venue was booked, my dress was purchased, and save the dates had gone out.
The wedding was planned for July 7, 2007. I pulled the plug in February of that year. Was it a good decision or not? (We’ll come back to that later.) Feedback is important, but not all feedback is important for you.
Yesterday, I got feedback from a book circle that I led with a group of leaders from September through December. Some of the feedback was about me, and some of it was about the process (which, is also, indirectly, about me.) One person replied that the process was too long and wanted to have fewer sessions, over a shorter period of time. I can pinpoint the exact moment that I knew I wanted to pursue a field in education and learning.
I was 16 years old, and was sitting in my American Studies class, in my awkward wooden desk, taking notes as my teacher talked on and on about some US historical topic (see how much I remembered!) Most of the time, I really appreciated this particular teacher, but on this day, all I could think was: "This could be done so much better." It's been more than 30 years since that day, and luckily some K-12 school-systems have shifted their learning practices completely.  When people have asked how the start of 2026 has been, I’ve been quite honest. It’s been quiet - quieter than in year’s passed. As an infopreneur, those quiet moments can feel scary. Being independent takes a high risk threshold, and when you’re in a family with two independents it can feel even riskier.
When I moved from coaching to facilitating book circles, I bridged the transition by teaching English at a local private school. It gave me some security as I grew into my new business, and tested out what would work and what wouldn’t.  “Am I chained?”
This question sits on the pages of one of my notebooks from December 18th. I re-read it again yesterday. Obviously, I am not physically chained, but at the time I imagine that I was feeling metaphorically chained. Following this question was another: “What desires feel alive in me? What desires am I suppressing or talking myself out of?” This seems relevant to me now, after having attending the Level 1 Training in Deep Democracy last week because as part of that training, we dove into the idea that every role and archetype we see outside in the world, is also within us. Which means, I may sometimes feel like a prisoner, but I am also the jailer. “He’s like an adult 9-year-old.”
Over the last few months, my son has gotten super into watching all things MarkRober. He started watching his YouTube videos, and before I knew it, I was ordering these “Build Box” engineering kits for Christmas presents, spending a ridiculous amount of money on shipping from California to France. Over the holidays, while we were watching way more TV than normal, I discovered that this Rober guy’s got a whole show on Netflix, with multiple seasons. The first time I watched, it was the episode where he builds a super robot, which goes into battle with 4 other robots to see who will win. I felt like I was watching teenage boys. When the athletic director called me, I wasn’t sure what to make of it. Could I really coach the varsity girls’ basketball team at the local high school? I stopped playing basketball myself at 15, and these girls would be older than that, and probably better than I was.
I decided to go in for the interview just for the experience. Then I got the offer. I took the leap and decided that I would figure it out on the way. I did. After several years of not winning a single game, we won three that first year. Back then, I was supporting the development of athletes and today, I mostly support the development of better leaders. Yet, in a sense, it’s not that much different. Every Thursday night, my husband and I have a babysitter come so we can go out. It’s not a typical date night, with low lighting and a nice dinner. We don’t even go to a movie.
We go rock climbing. A little while back, they changed all the routes on the wall where we climb, which is always a treat. It represents new challenges to embark on and conquer. They can also make you crazy with frustration. Currently, I am stuck on a beige colored route on rope number 13. It’s a 6b if that means anything to you - a level that I can normally climb. As I walked out of the shop with box in hand, I noticed two little ones sitting in the car adjacent to mine, curled over a phone “playing.” I was curious what they were doing, and also curious about the changes since I was their age - I would have either been in the shop with my parent, or sitting in the car reading a book.
Neither of which may be considered play. As I re-read, Dr. Stuart Brown’s book Play : How it Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul, I find myself spending more and more time thinking about how play has shifted with the evolution of technology. |
Hi there!I am Theresa Destrebecq. |
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