Not That 80/20 Rule

Most of us have heard of Pareto's Principle, also known as the 80/20 rule.

If not, it states that 80% of consequences come from 20% of the causes.

Did you know that there's another 80/20 rule?

Here's how it plays out....

Tomorrow, I am getting on a plane with my husband and our 2 children. With me, I will have several plastic bags -- hopefully with no holes in them.

As you can guess, the bags are for potential vomit.

Not vomit due to turbulence, or motion sickness.
Vomit due to fear.

We've all heard of the actors who throw up in the green room before they get on stage, only to kill it once they're in front of the crowd.

That's my daughter.
She doesn't have stage fright.
She has plane-fright.

No matter how many times we've flown, and no matter how many times we have talked her through the experience, or she has talked herself through the experience, her body has something else to say.

She's thrown up in taxis.
She's thrown up on the side of the road.
She's thrown up waiting in line to check bags.
She's thrown up sitting in security.
She's even thrown up in her own shoes, once we've boarded.

No matter what we say, or how reassured she feels, she inevitably throws up.

We used to resist the throw up moments, but now we lean into them because we know that once she gets it out of her system she'll "kill it" just like the actors do.

Why?

Because of the other 80/20 rule.

This rule comes from Polyvagal Theory, and states that 80% of information about our experience comes from the body to the brain, while only 20% of information flows the other way. (You can read more about it via Deb Dana or Stephen Porges)

Which means that for my daughter, no matter how much her brain says she's safe, her body knows differently.

Unfortunately, we often don't listen to our bodies.

Yesterday, I was interacting with a former book circle member, and she mentioned that things were challenging at work at the moment, so she was on sabbatical to think things through.

I encouraged her to feel things through, too.

Often times, our bodies know what our minds don't want to admit.

Do you listen to your body? What kinds of things does it tell you?

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